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17/52 – Writing

A portrait of my son, once a week, every week,  for the 3rd year of his life. 

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Anakin: So focused while you try to write in the morning sun in our living room. Three of my favourite things in one shot; you, light and dark. I’m often drawn to extremes, you’ve somehow managed to ground me some place in between. Most times at least. 

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16/52 – Bestemor

A portrait of my son, once a week, every week, for the 3rd year of his life.  

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Anakin: You were so excited when we told you bestemor (grandma) was coming for a visit. She was welcomed with open arms and since then you have been beside yourself with excitement and joy. Every morning you run into your room to check if she is still there, and thankfully she will be for another week. It is a pleasure watching you glow and embrace her with your all-encompassing love. While I wish you could grow up surrounded by your family in Norway, I hope you  will come to understand the choices we have made and why we have made them. And it helps to know how much you love and adore your Australian family. 

While we don’t see your grandparents very often, I am thankful for the likes of Skype and FaceTime which allow you to know them anyway. They will not be strangers to you. And I know this because I saw first hand the warm embrace you gave your bestemor the moment you saw her. 

As for myself, I am not only thankful for getting to spend time with my mother, but also to have some time off. 

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15/52- Ear muffs

A portrait of my son, once a week, every week, for the 3rd year of his life.

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Anakin: You insisted on still wearing the ear muffs you’d been playing with while taking a bath.

 I love you just that little bit more for all your kooky ideas. 

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14/52 – Blue eyes

A portrait of my son, once a week, every week, for the 3rd year of his life.

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Anakin: You fell to the ground after playing in the leaves I had raked together. We talked about the cycle of seasons. You fell silent for  a moment as you watched a plane fly by above us.

Your eyes are a blue ocean I’d more than happily drown in.

Linking up with Jodi

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The Cat Inside

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“The cat does not offer services. The cat offers itself. Of course he wants care and shelter. You don’t buy love for nothing.”
William S. Burroughs, The Cat Inside

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Poor, old Quincey, if only you knew how much he adores you. To him every small affection you share brightens his day in ways you and I can only imagine. He’ll grow older and his touch will grow gentler, but his love for you will still be all-encompassing. Sometimes love is tough… if you’re an old cat.

___   ___   ___

If you’re a cat person, I highly recommend reading The Cat Inside by William S. Burroughs. It’s a treat.

A different week

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It’s been a bit of  a different week for us. Solo parenting for 7 days while my partner is in LA for work. This time has been a whole new deal for a little boy who struggles to understand where pappa is and why he isn’t coming home every night, or why he isn’t next to us in bed in the morning. Moods run high and low, and the need for stability and comfort is bigger.

It’s heartbreaking to hear his little voice call out for pappa and to see the look on his face when he realises pappa is still not here.

It’s hard work, but we’re doing fine

I’ve stepped a bit away from gadgets, work and distractions this week, trying to keep my focus where it needs to be and unplug. An emotional toddler is hard work, but one that misses his pappa is even harder. I’ve quite enjoyed the quiet nights despite being so exhausted I can hardly keep my eyes open. And I admit to have sought out the comfort of a glass of wine (or three) after the sun goes down and the house is quiet.

But I can’t wait for Tuesday and this again.

 

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My boys together. Doesn’t get any better than that.

13/52 – Dancer

A portrait of my son, once a week, every week, for the 3rd year of his life.

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Anakin: We managed to go to the Melbourne Now show before it closed its doors with some friends. Our first and most important stop was Darren Sylvester’s dance floor. Who doesn’t like a boogie, right? You started off quite modestly, taking it all in, watching the colours change, seeing the ebb and the flow of the lights, slow dancing from side to side while observing people come and go. Once you knew what was what the gloves came off and you owned every inch of that floor. Your face was full of pure joy, you kept running in circles and attempted something we could only decipher as breakdance. What a treat to watch you go!

I snapped this when you were looking at a girl dancing across from you. Her reflection is caught perfectly on the wall behind you, it’s like seeing two frames in one. This image has so much going for it, the chaos on the right, the focus on the left, and me caught in the middle.

For a few seconds you were enthralled… and then you kept dancing.

Babywearing

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Hands-free love. Hold them close while still doing the things you need to do.

Anakin recently inherited my Gizmo. He’s been eyeing it for a long time, but it was in dire need of repair and a wash, and it was still my mogwai. I’ve had it since I was a kid, Gizmo has gone everywhere with me. Gizmo is the teddybear for me. He was my sidekick for a long time, even way into adulthood, which is why he is in Australia with me. It wasn’t until a couple of weeks ago that I felt ready to hand him over. But first he got some much needed repair work and a good wash. (Yep, totally put him in the washing machine and crossed my fingers evil gremlins wouldn’t appear.)

 

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Since Anakin got Gizmo he has become his best friend. Gizmo goes pretty much everywhere Anakin goes. And being a big fan of sitting in the Tula himself, Anakin wanted to wear Gizmo too.  It’s much easier to ride your bike while babywearing than while baby-carrying. The first day Gizmo sat in the old Baby Bjørn, the carrier we used before we knew better. (Now we know better hence the Tula!) Since I am not a fan of the bjørn, neither was I when we were still using it, I decided to make a Mei Tai for Anakin to carry Gizmo in. Happiness all around.

 

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It is sweet watching the love Anakin has for his new friend. Gizmo is breastfed, put to bed, sung to, read to and taken for train rides.

 

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Except for some competition from a newly acquired storm trooper, Gizmo is Anakin’s main man.

 

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Each day is a little life…

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Each day is a little life: every waking and rising a little birth, every fresh morning a little youth, every going to rest and sleep a little death.
                                                              – A.Schopenhauer

 

12/52- Have lots of dreams

A portrait of my son, once a week, every week, for the 3rd year of his life.

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Anakin: I could watch you sleep for hours. There is something so reassuring about listening to your slow breath. For a short time it’s easy to imagine you as a baby again. Your face is so soft, so peaceful. 

was watching a show the other day where a dad was putting his daughter to bed. Instead of saying “sweet dreams” he said “have lots of dreams”. It was something that resonated with me. I want you to have lots of dreams. Whatever they are, embrace them. I hope you will be a dreamer who sets no limits for himself, and wishing you only sweet dreams sets such a limit. 

Have lots of dreams, my love. Have as many as you can. 

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